


Kurt and Blaine Talk About Sex and Death

by wowbright



Series: Fidelity Series [7]
Category: Glee
Genre: Fluff, Headcanon, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-30
Updated: 2013-09-30
Packaged: 2018-05-02 12:05:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5247647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wowbright/pseuds/wowbright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A few weeks after their first time, Kurt and Blaine have a light-hearted postcoital conversation about love, sex and death. Set in early Season 3.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kurt and Blaine Talk About Sex and Death

**Author's Note:**

> This is a deleted scene from Chapter 3 of Fidelity, but can be read on its own for people who can’t get enough of Kurt and Blaine talking to each other.
> 
> Warnings: Blithe talk about death and vague talk about Kurt’s mom. It’s not meant to be depressing and the boys don’t perceive it as depressing, but I know that’s not everyone’s cuppa, so you’ve been warned.

They’re in undershirts and briefs after their post-sex shower: Kurt’s a white round-neck and[ red bikini briefs](http://www.bodyjockco.com/falocco-tropical-heat-red-swimmers-brief-bjc139-p-282.html) that Blaine claims should be illegal for the lust they engender, and Blaine’s a beige tank and boxer briefs with pinstripes that Kurt says follow the curve of his ass (and other bulges) irresistibly. Blaine sits in front of the bathroom mirror as Kurt stands beside him, slicking raspberry-scented gel through his curls.

“You know,” Kurt says, “you should really consider letting your hair go natural some of the time, if only for the expediency of not having to touch it up every time we have sex.”

Blaine meets Kurt’s eyes in the mirror. “I like my hairstyle. And I like it when you do my hair.”

Kurt starts to palm Blaine’s hair flat, section by section. “The sex is really just an excuse to get me to do your hair, isn’t it? You know, you could just ask.”

Blaine blushes. “You know it’s not.”

“And you know that I know, and yet I make you blush, anyway. That’s my favorite part.”

Blaine does that smile that’s so big, his eyes scrunch up. “You’re my favorite part.”

“Okay, I’m sure I could make a raunchy joke out of that, but you melted my brain so many times this afternoon that I’m not even going to try.” Kurt reaches for the wide-tooth comb and drags it back through Blaine’s hair in long strokes, temple to nape.

“I had no idea sex would be this good when I first learned about it. Of course, they only told me about sex with girls.”

“Ugh.” Kurt scrunches his face in disgust. “Yeah, well, when I first learned about sex, it was about sex between my parents.”

“Did you walk in on them?”

“Thank goodness, no.” Kurt stands back, studying the back of Blaine’s hair, then patting it with satisfaction. “But I heard them. Only I didn’t know that’s what I was hearing. I went through a list of all the things it could possibly be and I finally settled on banshees. Until I heard my dad start to swear. So then I decided that there was just one banshee, and that my dad was yelling at it, trying to scare it away, and my mom was either scared into silence or sleeping through the whole thing.”

Kurt turns on the faucet and begins to wash off his hands. “For a while after we buried my mom, I wondered if the banshee had been there to warn her that she would die, and that’s why my mom was so quiet through the whole thing – just terrified, you know? – and why my dad was so angry at it. I said something about it to my dad one day and he said, ‘No, Kurt, there’s no such thing as ghosts. Where did you get that idea?’ and what followed was the most horrifying conversation of my life.”

Kurt shudders dramatically and pats his hands off on the towel at the edge of the sink. As soon as he’s done, Blaine lunges up and pulls Kurt to him. “Even worse than the sex talk I put your dad up to last March?” They’re standing chest-to-chest, hand-in-hand in the middle of the bathroom, bare feet on cold tile, and it’s a most wonderful place to be.

“Ten times worse.”

“What did he say?”

“After my banshee comment?”

“Yeah.”

Kurt creeps his toes onto Blaine’s to catch a bit of their warmth. “I blocked most of it out. Something about when a man and a woman love each other very much … I’ll have to undergo regressive hypnotherapy if you want me to recover all the gory details. But I’d rather not.”

Blaine rubs his nose against Kurt’s. “Is that what turned you into a baby penguin?”

“Ugh. I’m never going to live that one down, am I? You know I never really was, once I hit puberty. I mean, I didn’t know a lot about sex, but I certainly spent enough time trying to imagine it.” Kurt presses his forehead against Blaine’s.

“Mmmm. I’m looking forward to learning more about those thoughts.” Their faces are so close now. It’s really impossible not to kiss, especially now that there’s no water in the way to slide them apart. It’s just a peck, but it’s perfect, and Kurt’s heart does a[  _pas de deux_](http://www.thefreedictionary.com/pas+de+deux). “You’re so sexy. Which is why it’s so adorable that you said the baby penguin thing in the first place.”

“I said it because I was panicking. Because apparently you thought I had absolutely no sex appeal. So I needed an excuse for why.”

“I thought you had sex appeal. Like  _all the time_. Just not right then, when you were trying to. Which was why it was so confusing. The contrast, you know. Because you holding a  _pencil_  is sexy.”

“Pencil fetish?” Kurt says, pulling Blaine through the bathroom door and into the bedroom. He stops resignedly in front of the vanity, where their neatly folded clothes from earlier in the day await them. They both look at them with trepidation.

Blaine wraps his arms around Kurt’s side and buries his face in the side of Kurt’s neck. “Kurt fetish.”

“You know what I love about you?” Kurt sighs.

“I think you told me once that you loved everything about me.” Blaine blushes and lowers his eyes – out of embarrassment or coyness, Kurt’s not sure.

Kurt pulls Blaine tight to his side, his hand on Blaine’s hip.[ _Grand battement en cloche_](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knncPiPBZBE) _._ “Well, yes, now that you mention it. But I was going to highlight something specific.”

“Okay.” Blaine looks up at him, eyes big and unblinking.[  _Entrechat-quatre_](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8SudtOd2Ig) _._

“I love that when I mention my mother, you don’t get that hurt, careful look that people usually get, like they’ve just stepped on broken glass and they’re worried that the next step they take will just land them in more of it.”

“Huh,” says Blaine, one hand still around Kurt’s waist, the other absently fingering the collar of his folded shirt. “I didn’t used to look like that, though? At least the first time you told me about her? I remember being kind of stunned and not sure what to say.”

Kurt’s exhalation is something like a laugh. “I believe you said, 'That sucks.’”

“Seriously?” Blaine’s head swerves back, his mouth agape.

“Yeah. But in a way that I could tell you really meant it. You looked … sad  _with_  me. Not  _for_  me.” Kurt strokes Blaine’s jaw and smiles. “I fell a little more in love with you then. And then when we buried Pavarotti and you compared it to my mom’s funeral, I was like, 'Whoa! No one says stuff like that.’”

“Because it’s completely insensitive?” Blaine’s voice has that tone that says he thinks he’s right, but he hopes he’s not.

“Because you just said what you were thinking. Because you weren’t afraid to be you around me. Because you weren’t afraid of me and all my – ” Kurt circles his hand in the air “ – whatever. It was the best feeling ever.”

Blaine sighs and gives Kurt a tight squeeze. “I have a hard time sometimes not saying what I think around you. I don’t know why. I’m so used to  _not_ saying what I think around everyone else.”

“Oh, honey.” Kurt massages the small of Blaine’s back. “I’m glad you can speak your mind around me.”


End file.
